• 2010-04-14

    【安】安爱写字

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    http://www.blogbus.com/annsart-logs/62143906.html


    我总是会害怕自己有一天会消失
    所以总是打算在自己的身体或者情感的某一处找一个可以牵系起来的东西
    离开中国是这样 学习艺术也是这样
    这好像是一种与生俱来的游离的能力 与谁都不亲近 但是与任何人都能靠的很近很近

    学习心理学的过程之中明白一件事情 都是关于人的大脑其实是早已经固定好的 也就是说其实人这一生是有命这件东西存在的
    喜欢吃什么喝什么 长成什么 都是一个个可以被规划出来的 而可贵又可怕的是 这种规划是不能被自己的主张意识所掌控的
    所谓人的主观意识就是自己可以认清的思考过程和接受的从外界而来的信息 而人的潜意识好像一个归类员 可以把这些东西归类 “自觉地”认为一些东西是不可靠的
    于是 我大概就成为了这样一种人

     

    I am always afraid that one day i would suddenly disappear.

    Leaving my motherland is like this. Deciding to learn art is like this.
    To avoid this chance, I usually find something or someone to establish either an emotional or a physical bond.

    This ability is like a gift given whild i was still the embryo. I am never close to anyone, but I could become really close to everyone.

    Through the experience of studying psychology, I realized that it is a fact that one's brian is predetermined before borned. On the other hand, it is like saying "There is something called faith existing."

    What i like to drink, what i like to eat, what kind of person that i am gonna to grow up to be, has been already planned.  However, this plan is not controlled or known by my subjectivity.

    My definition for subjectivity is something that one can recognize clearly about himself or herself, and the information that one collect from the external environment. Nevertheless, one somehow listens to his or her subconsciousness more. When the subconsciousness classifies the explicit voices into the "unreliable" catalog, one would just simply give it up.

    艺术家是一类很奇怪的人 希望被理解的同时又生产出很多让人匪夷所思的东西
    一边渴望被熟识 但是还要离开所有大众认为理所当然的概念
    所谓高难度职业 大概也就是如此了吧


    Artists belong to a very strange group. They are eager to be understood, however, they keep producing the baaroque things. They are yearn for fame, meanwhile, keep leaving the public concepts.

    Those so-called "highly-challenged" jobs...maybe just like this...


    我想生命之中有些东西真的是很难很难 而这些东西都与人们常理上认为的成就无关
    比如 让别人听到自己想说的话 比如 可以以一种不张扬的方式让周围的人结识一个真诚的自己
    金钱 地位 还有学位 其实都是在这些之后的 但是大多数人总是采用另外一种方式来履行这一职责 认为那些东西都是可以依靠这些来达到的

    I think that something in our lives is extremely difficult to obtain. And these things are unrelated with those things, which could be called "achievements" in the common sense.

    Such as, willing others could really listen to what oneself really says, using a quiet way to let others know a real you, etc.

    Money, status, diploma actually come after..However, for the majority, the opposite situations happen more frequently. People sometimes think that maybe those things would only be gained by money, status, etc....


    心要很静 才能做成事
    或者才能觉得自己做的事是有意义的

    The mind has to be peaceful. Then you can do things.

    Or you can really feel what you are doing is meaningful.

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